*Might have been inspired by The Zombies*
Now I know I’m old and single
Maybe prone to a silly thought
There’s a woman called Alexa
Who is driving me distraught
Though she’ll turn the volume lower
And tell jokes without a care
When I want to know her better
She’s not there
When I need some information
Maybe learn some history
She will give me all that’s needed
She solves every mystery
But when night falls and I’m lonely
Alexa drives me to despair
I would marry her tomorrow
But she’s not there
She obeys my every order
Switches lights both on and off
She’ll suggest a piece of music
Maybe play Rachmaninoff
But when I ask her to come closer
Run my fingers through her hair
She is not so quick to answer
‘Cos she’s not there
Alexa is not for you Roy …….she is such a tart😂
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You mean…she gets around? 😧 Then the wedding’s cancelled 😃
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Best you know now Roy ❤️you can get the deposit back😁
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*Sobs uncontrollably*
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Plenty of fish swimming around that rock……and further afield ❤️
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🐟🐟
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🦭🦈🐬🐋🐋🐟🐠🐡🦐🦞🦀🦑🐙🦪🪸🦂
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Tell me you don’t have an Alexa!!! It is bad enough having a fishwife as your spouse, as Teddy will testify. 😊
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Haha, ‘fishwife’ is a great insult, not heard so much these days. Not in these parts anyway. And no, I’m actually Alexa-less 🙂
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Thank goodness you are Alexa free! Teddy’s aunt was a real fishwife from Peterhead…
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Ah! That makes sense. Not Texas dialect then 🙂
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I have to admit that I screech like a fishwife…no matter where I live! 🐡
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Love it, but do you really have Alexa?! 😏
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I absolutely don’t Jane 🙂 I can see how such a gadget might be really useful for those with limited movement or disabilities, but otherwise I regard it as a bit of an affectation I’m afraid.
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Phew, that’s a relief! 😊 Terrific poem.
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This made me smile 🙂
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Thanks ER. That’s good that you smiled, I can’t take poetry too seriously.
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I won’t have an Alexa, I’m still convinced that artificial intelligence will take over the world one day and Alexa is just the beginning….
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I say bring it on! Hopefully AI will be programmed to rule the world in the most ethical and morally correct manner in the interests of all its inhabitants. Our present so-called leaders do nothing of the sort.
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Loving that you’re channeling your inner poet and lyrics writer, Roy:). And glad to hear you’re being careful with the things that listen as I like to call them. Privacy matters.
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That’s a point. I read that Amazon tailor their adverts on what you say to Alexa 😮
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We had Google home for a bit and I realized that it really was “listening. “We would talk about something very weird and specific and then suddenly I’d be seeing ads and other things about related topics. Decided it was time to put that away for a while😳
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Hi infact disabling Google Home also doesn’t solve the problem. All mobile phones are always listening, even if you revoke permissions. The best solution is to purchase mic block. Tiny devices but does the job.
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It’s true
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Loved reading this! However Alexa has a reputation for being a fiesty stalker. She listens to everything you tell her. And also the things that you don’t. 😅
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Crikey I’m glad I don’t actually have an Alexa then 😦
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This is SO good. It’s funny, and yet it’s very sad. For the lonely-hearted, I can see how at least hearing a ‘human voice’ in the house might seem uplifting. But, like you, I don’t have an “alexa.” I’d rather get up and turn on my own lights on, thank you. But my daughter and her family depend on Alexa all the time: “what’s the temperature out?” “Give me a recipe for beef stew.” And at night my 10-year-old grandson actually says to Alexa as he puts the light out to sleep “Play me some guided meditation.” Sigh. I guess Alexa is here to stay.
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Ah, thank you Pam 🙂 Yes I’ve no doubt there are lonely people who regard Alexa and her relatives as a bit of company. Maybe they are the future and I wonder how they will evolve? But I hadn’t realised (and Mithai and Kristine have pointed out) that Alexa is a snitch – listening, watching and telling all our secrets to her overlords. Now how that might develop in the future is scary.
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Oh yes, lots of tales of Alexa snitching. Which is one (just one of the many) reasons we will never invite her into our house!
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