(Sung to the tune of ‘The British Grenadiers’)

Some talk of Robin Cousins and some of Bartelski

Of Alcott and Jayne Torvill

The greats of history

But of all our winter heroes there’s none of whom we dream

Who will bring great glory to our shores

But the British Curling Team

When they step out onto the ice they step so merrily

And neither do they fall about

They have gripper shoes you see

I guess they’re likely legal but maybe they are not

But it means they are so steady as

They line up their first shot

The British stone it slides away and ends up in the house

The foreign shot is very poor

Enough to make them grouse

For all their busy sweepers their shots go all astray

While the British stones line up and guard

Their winning shots all day

All through the opening rounds they’ll go

Beating every team in sight

For none at all can match their skill

And they’re beaten out of sight

And when they reach the final we’ll watch them on TV

By now we know the funny rules and recite them endlessly

And now we have new heroes

We sing of Eve and Bruce

For never do they miss a shot none of them are ever loose

But if they lose the final they’ll ruin our greatest dream

No longer are they British

They’re the Scottish Curling Team